Pariah

So this girl walks up to another girl and says "Hey, have you heard of the Bechdel Test?" And the other girl says, "Yeah, my boyfriend was telling me about it the other day!"

Well, then it just started accelerating in a different direction.

I remember reading once upon a time about a Swedish fighter jet called Drakken and thinking that would be a cool name for a superhero.

Especially for little kids. Whenever I bathe Little Girl Pariah, I come away from the experience looking like I've been in a submarine that was hit.

Hence the joke about how power is stressed out because his boss is always making him work over time.

Actually, the correct answers are 'him' and 'no' (thankfully!).

Today's Big Question: Which child will wake up first, and will (s)he need a bath?

It seems to be, yes. I mean, they keep doing it and all.

Multi-level marketing. Woo-hoo! NEW TOPIC: Foxbat's latest Master Plan involves multi-level marketing. What's he selling?

On the other hand, with no power comes no responsibility.

And is the one after that potassium?

Q: How many Mac users does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. Apple engineers decided that the average Mac user would never need to change a light bulb, so there's no way to do it. Have you considered upgrading to an iLamp?

'97-'98 and '98-'99, in fact. The first broke a 13-year NFC winning streak (which included three Broncos losses, true).

Q - All right, mister, freeze right there. Gimme all your money. And your watch and cell phone. And your pants, too, while we're at it. A - Treat her like a lady, ya jackwagon!

First day of school: "Welcome back, my friends, to the show that never ends!"

"Sacrifice the Fool" by Venice

My Dad taught us four rules for fighting: 1. You do not fight. 2. You do not fight. 3. You do not fight. 4. If you do fight, you win.

From Let ε < 0: Good reasons for not doing your math homework: I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames. I have the proof, but there isn’t room to write it in this margin. I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn’t actually reach it. I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to prove that it converged. I couldn’t figure out whether i am the square of negative one or i is the square root of negative one. I locked the paper in my trunk but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it. I took time out to snack on a doughnut and a cup of coffee. I spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk. I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle, but this morning I couldn’t find it. I’ve included a reference to the solutions manual, reducing this assignment to one previously solved. I had too much π and got sick.

I, however, have no idea what happened to the Vikings in their Super Bowls. Maybe you can dig up some old Betamax tapes (or maybe this was still in the 16 mm era?) and give us a brief description.

I felt like posting a few chemistry jokes today, but I didn't. All the good ones argon.

We have a Creepy Pics thread over in NGD, you know.

On last year's final exam, I included a question from the previous exam that we went over in excruciating detail. All I did was to change the name of the compound, which had no relevance whatsoever to solving the problem. The two most common scores on that problem were 5/5 and 0/5.

Q - Is that really an entire company of 10,000 Orcs twerking? Poke my eyes out now, please. A - I'm gonna need Xena tapes and an endless supply of Hot Pockets.

What you did there, I see it.

In addition to Boyle, you could include Traité élémentaire de chimie (Elementary Treatise of Chemistry) by Antoine Lavoisier, published in 1789. It's widely considered the first modern chemistry textbook. In some ways, it is to chemistry what Philosophiæ Naturalis Principia Mathematica is to physics.