Old Man

Which half are you in?

Wait, so my Members Only jacket isn't enough for me to be cool? I have to have an elite cadre now too?

Is there an Oscar category for sports "fouls"? Should there be separate ones for basketball and soccer?

808017424794512875886459904961710757005754368×109 ?

To crush their enemies, see them driven before them, and to hear the lamentation of the women?

You think he wouldn't buy it on purpose?

Won't anyone think of the Celts?

Isn't it who when you would answer he and whom when you would answer him? Something like that? English, m*****f*****, do you speak it?

Did you know that When tweetle beetles fight, it's called a tweetle beetle battle? And when they battle in a puddle, it's a tweetle beetle puddle battle? AND when tweetle beetles battle with paddles in a puddle, they call it a tweetle beetle puddle paddle battle? AND... When beetles battle beetles in a puddle paddle battle and the beetle battle puddle is a puddle in a bottle... ...they call this a tweetle beetle bottle puddle paddle battle muddle? AND... When beetles fight these battles in a bottle with their paddles and the bottle's on a poodle and the poodle's eating noodles... ...they call this a muddle puddle tweetle poodle beetle noodle bottle paddle battle? AND...?

As it happens I went to an ISSA seminar on ransomware last week. It was frightening. Not patching is not an option.

The Russians will be very happy to hear this.

Oh god, I hate that grip. I get shoulder cramps just looking at pictures of it.

Yeah, there's a John Wick thread around here somewhere that went into that. I'm still stuck in Weaver stance mode, which is now at least two trendy gun techniques out of fashion.

Bring me a blowtorch, stat! The wound must be cauterized before he bleeds out!

Maybe they could make a comic book movie that isn't an origin story? Crazy talk, I know.

I'd say she looks unusually confident considering her outfit.

Ice is actually really cold water. If you make it cold enough, it crystallizes into a solid.

On this day in 1996, Van Hagar broke up. By phone.

Is that an admission of guilt?

Yeah. I do wonder what Orlando did to piss off the gods like that, though.

She wasn't visiting Orlando?

I'd like to see Sanders chair the Senate Finance Committee.

Perhaps as a fundraising measure he could offer to teach people some of his business and real estate skills for a princely sum.

Web filtering is not as easy as it sounds.