Lawnmower Boy Posted January 20, 2014 Report Share Posted January 20, 2014 "Oh, hey, good to see you, A---. Ready to start your first day of work? I guess that means you quit your old job? Hmm. Now, I know that we never got back to you after that phone call where we said we'd get everything nailed down right away, but, well, and there's a funny story about that. No, really funny. I swear, you'll laugh when you hear it. Hilarious. Oh. And by the way, don't bother punching in." Seriously. Though, to his credit, our District Manager showed up to explain in person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted January 20, 2014 Report Share Posted January 20, 2014 Oh the joys of Amazon ! Charlie's Angels first season is less than two different Wrestlemania shows. And this is before they made them two or three disc DVDs. But I had to have 13 and 14. It's the Undertaker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted January 21, 2014 Report Share Posted January 21, 2014 Dear diary, Another day and some more art that I commissioned via Deviantart is linked in the Superhero Images thread in the Champions forum. And yet not one single like for any of them. SOB ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted January 21, 2014 Report Share Posted January 21, 2014 Have you ever been half-asleep watching a sport on TV and in a moment of clarity realize there's not much in the way of plot or dialogue? Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted January 21, 2014 Report Share Posted January 21, 2014 I do love the Complicate the Poster thread. And the fact that I can throw and receive hand grenades. Many thanks to Der Roter Baron for a wonderful Over The Top rebuttal regarding my 'fact' concerning his preferance of biplanes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted January 25, 2014 Report Share Posted January 25, 2014 One day I will tell my son that I am older than the internet and it will blow his mind. Burrito Boy and tkdguy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawnmower Boy Posted January 25, 2014 Report Share Posted January 25, 2014 Once upon a time, a grocery chain decided that it had had enough with all of that working out exchange rates and bothering about the US-Canadian border. "Canada is run by oligopolies," it decided. "Eventually, one of them will buy our Canadian division, because that is the way that Canadians do things, the silly people. In the mean time, we can save muchos dineros by not spending on frivolities such as upgraded IT that the new owners will just have to tear out and replace with their stuff anyway!" And, lo, so it came to pass. And the new owners said, "Well, between the time when we actually integrate our IT across our new division, we should look into this whole 'tap to pay' thing, because the EFT readers at store-level are on their last legs anyway, so it will get us extra custom without really costing us anything." One little boy said, "But what if there are problems with backwards compatibility with the twenty-year-old servers, like there are every time we have this brainstorm?" Fortunately, a sharp glance from the CEO proved sufficient to silence the little boy, who was well aware of what Lovecraftian horrors await behind codewords like "we wish him luck in his next assignment," orm unspeakable horror to end all unspeakable horrors, "resigned to spend more time with his family." Surprisingly enough, however, the little boy was right. There were backwards compatibility issues. Specifically, unless all tills around the store were manually signed off before 'store close,' and then left signed off for an hour afterwards, the entire store EFT payment system would crash at some point the next day, rendering the store "cash only" until the next business day. Because, you know, that is a totally acceptable consequence for falling short of a no-fault process. On a personal note, I am very grateful that I have not crashed the store since we discovered the fault. The one time I did it before that was fun, though. tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vondy Posted January 26, 2014 Report Share Posted January 26, 2014 Pseudo-Intellectual Blowhard of the Day: "We love authenticity, that's why we have a billion reality shows." Neal Gabler. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted January 30, 2014 Report Share Posted January 30, 2014 After my fall on Sunday I have only noticed today that my foot is bruised. It is quite a livid purple bruise as the bruise higher on my leg also is but my ankle also was swollen a little which I did not notice. The swelling, and pain, on the upper part of my leg below the knee was admittadly what I had noticed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted February 1, 2014 Report Share Posted February 1, 2014 Oddhat “I speak to Jesus every Tuesday. He never really wants to talk theology, but I've learned a lot about kung fu films and cooking.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 2, 2014 Report Share Posted February 2, 2014 Explain this to me. I'm on Youtube. I click on the official video for AC/DC Touch Too Much and I get an advert for Justin Beiber's latest video. What On Earth ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vondy Posted February 4, 2014 Report Share Posted February 4, 2014 Life has changed. For the first fourteen years of marriage my wife dressed like your typical married orthodox Jewish woman: sneakers, long skirts, long sleeved blouses, a headscarf. Subdued colors were preferred. It was not uncommon for people with little experience of orthodox Jews to ask her if she was a nun. Well, that was yesterday. Today, she walked into the office wearing black strappy heels, leopard print tights, a black, sleeveless stretch turtleneck, sunglasses, and a leather jacket. And, she had her hair styled and given a rinse. She did say she had a surprise for me. I'm not complaining mind you. She's got a bit of it. And, oddly, it works for her. Wowza! But, who is this woman and what has she done with my wife? Burrito Boy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vondy Posted February 4, 2014 Report Share Posted February 4, 2014 At what point did our government decide that twitter was an acceptable medium for diplomatic communication? I mean, talk about recipe for ineloquence, misunderstanding, and war. One does not respond to criticism of the Secretary of State by foreign politicians in a tweet. In fact, as a rule, one does not respond at all if its a mere politician and not a national leader. If this is the thinking that drives Washington today -- no one is driving. tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted February 5, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2014 Finally got around to trying Apple Pages (the Mac answer to Microsoft Word) and... I may never use Word again. I'm actually kicking myself for putting up with Word for so long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbywolfe Posted February 7, 2014 Report Share Posted February 7, 2014 I know it's the "Creepy Pics thread" but it would still be nice if people would spoiler images of actual human remains... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vondy Posted February 9, 2014 Report Share Posted February 9, 2014 Frau Vondy watched Thank You For Smoking today. She said, "Now I understand your take on of media and politics." Word. Good movie. Love it. One of my favorites. Bazza 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vondy Posted February 10, 2014 Report Share Posted February 10, 2014 Today's top headlines on CNN: Hillary Clinton may have called Monica Lewinsky a "Loony Toon" when she learned Bill slept with her. Oh my. Gasp. That's it? And, a college jock who may well play in the NFL is gay. Yeah. Whatever. Question to the editors: wag the dog, much? There is real news out there to report that is much more important. No, really. There is. bigbywolfe 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 12, 2014 Report Share Posted February 12, 2014 The details are a little off, but this comes close to why I like these boards. EDIT: The punchline is not family-friendly, be warned. bigbywolfe, tkdguy, Bazza and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 14, 2014 Report Share Posted February 14, 2014 All this week one of our celebrities has been raising money for Sports Relief. It is all quite hard work as she is travelling from Edinburgh to London under her own steam in a week ending today in a Marathon into London. The weather has been utterly dreadful and she has been followed by cameras all week. The celebrity in question is Davina McCall, a 46 year old mother of three. There were real concerns after she had to be carried out of Lake Windermere after finishing the swim and that was Monday. Over the week she has raised £615,000 roughly $922,000. Her hard work and perseverence ought to be brought to a wider audience. Bazza 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 18, 2014 Report Share Posted February 18, 2014 Woo! We arrive for a week on Hawaii, in time for what seems likely to a very wet week, including winter advisory conditions on Mauna Loa and Mauna Kea. Iif I had to guess, when we go home in a week, we'll have this same storm dumping on WA and OR, too. we got the touch! L. Marcus 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted February 21, 2014 Report Share Posted February 21, 2014 How many albums does a band get before fans start saying "I like their old stuff better"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 23, 2014 Report Share Posted February 23, 2014 File under WOAH ! So I see the squirrels chasing each other up and down the trees and now we are upto 5 of them. Fair enough but then one gets close to my window on a few twigs. And then another comes up and they are giving each other a hard time. And then what do I see ? One squirrel holding on to the other and fighting him as the second squirrel is holding onto the twigs of the tree and the both drop off the tree to the ground. We are talking about 20 odd feet here. And they both lived through it and went on chasing each other. Burrito Boy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKJAM! Posted February 23, 2014 Report Share Posted February 23, 2014 Put up an old picture of me with a celebrity impersonation on my blog. http://www.skjam.com/2014/02/23/open-thread-my-doctor-visit/ Drop on by and share a story, maybe read a few reviews? SKJAM! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted February 24, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 24, 2014 Tried ice skating for the first time yesterday, with the older offspring. Now my neck hurts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 27, 2014 Report Share Posted February 27, 2014 This morning I seem to living in a region with a significant local maximum in the ambient snark field. L. Marcus 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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