Asperion Posted January 23, 2017 Report Share Posted January 23, 2017 Q: So, you saw that I got early parole, right? A: There's no evidence that that's ever been true. Q: So what Annihilus think of your suggestion for Trump becoming his next aide? A: Those dogs of war are actually poodles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 23, 2017 Report Share Posted January 23, 2017 A: Those dogs of war are actually poodles. Q: We're being invaded by France? ! A: It's not like they burned Tulsa to the ground or anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 30, 2017 Report Share Posted January 30, 2017 A: It's not like they burned Tulsa to the ground or anything. Q: So you're not going to negotiate with the group of activists whose motto is "Take Back Oklahoma!"? A: Why do you have to look up to her, aside from in the literal sense? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 30, 2017 Report Share Posted January 30, 2017 A: Why do you have to look up to her, aside from in the literal sense? Q: Giganta is my inspiration. I've always looked up to her. A: Maybe, if there's a way to contact the Alpha Site and if we can find 700 kg of fresh tomatoes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 Q: Giganta is my inspiration. I've always looked up to her. A: Maybe, if there's a way to contact the Alpha Site and if we can find 700 kg of fresh tomatoes. Q: What do you mean that they are from some other dimension and demanding one 700 kg tomato? A: We have discovered the ultimate fool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 A: We have discovered the ultimate fool. Q: What do you think of the outcome of our reality show about court jesters? A: If they had Reality TV on Westeros, this is what it would be like. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 A: If they had Reality TV on Westeros, this is what it would be like. Q: Have you ever seen this much blood?! A: She comes by it honestly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aylwin13 Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 A: She comes by it honestly. Q: How can Kellyanne Conway tell such bald-faced alternative facts? A: It's how they should have been doing it all along. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 A: It's how they should have been doing it all along. Q: Is it true that musicians are ditching Autotune and just singing with their own voices? A: I didn't ask for this. But I suppose I deserve it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 A: I didn't ask for this. But I suppose I deserve it. Q: Thank you so much for selling out the Kingdom to our Orcish Hordes! Any thoughts before we hang you? A: I imagine a Presidential Pardon is out of the question now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted February 7, 2017 Report Share Posted February 7, 2017 A: I imagine a Presidential Pardon is out of the question now. Q: Any last words before we execute you for assassinating the President? A: To sleep, perchance to dream. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted February 7, 2017 Report Share Posted February 7, 2017 A: To sleep, perchance to dream. Q: What do people who suffer from insomia wish for? A: Second door the left, you can't miss it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted February 7, 2017 Report Share Posted February 7, 2017 A: Second door the left, you can't miss it. Q: Which of these five doors is the tiger behind, do you suppose? A: I'd rather have a bologna sandwich with sauerkraut, if it's all the same to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted February 9, 2017 Report Share Posted February 9, 2017 Q: Which of these five doors is the tiger behind, do you suppose? A: I'd rather have a bologna sandwich with sauerkraut, if it's all the same to you. Q: Would you like this hot iron sandwich? A: The Penguin is having his day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 9, 2017 Report Share Posted February 9, 2017 A: The Penguin is having his day. Q: What in blazes is the deal with all the herring and ice blocks? A: He's what you call a cold fish. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 11, 2017 Report Share Posted February 11, 2017 A: He's what you call a cold fish. Q: Why do all the mermaids avoid the handsome, rich, and intelligent Prince of the Sea People? A: I will keep you safe -- even if I must kill you to do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted February 11, 2017 Report Share Posted February 11, 2017 Q: Why do all the mermaids avoid the handsome, rich, and intelligent Prince of the Sea People? A: I will keep you safe -- even if I must kill you to do it! Q: Why are all the guards carrying those guns at the family gathering? A: We have discovered a hole in reality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 11, 2017 Report Share Posted February 11, 2017 A: We have discovered a hole in reality. Q: These holographic VR holes are cool, but they lack something. Do you have anything that would please my jaded psyche? A: This is one of my very best hybrids -- a guy who always knows what time it is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 28, 2017 Report Share Posted February 28, 2017 Did I break the thread? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 28, 2017 Report Share Posted February 28, 2017 A: This is one of my very best hybrids -- a guy who always knows what time it is! Q: You f***ed with the clock and got what?!? A: No, there wasn't time enough for love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 1, 2017 Report Share Posted March 1, 2017 A: No, there wasn't time enough for love. Q: Say, 007, isn't that smoking crater where Fort Knox used to be a direct consequence of your response to Miss Galore? A: And don't call them Rock People. It's offensive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 2, 2017 Report Share Posted March 2, 2017 A: And don't call them Rock People. It's offensive. Q - Can we get rid of Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus and all the rest of these Rock People? A - Gimme the prize! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 2, 2017 Report Share Posted March 2, 2017 A - Gimme the prize! Q: Thanks for entering the World Seppuku Championship! Any last words before we begin? A: And this, girls, is why Barbie and Ken are in couples therapy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted March 2, 2017 Report Share Posted March 2, 2017 A: And this, girls, is why Barbie and Ken are in couples therapy.Q: Hey, why'd your doll end up with my Green Bay Packers bobblehead figure collection? A: Up and down; up and down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcus Impudite Posted March 2, 2017 Report Share Posted March 2, 2017 Q: Hey, why'd your doll end up with my Green Bay Packers bobblehead figure collection? A: Up and down; up and down. Q: What strokes should you use when painting a fence? A: I wouldn't f*** her with my worst enemy's hectocotyli. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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