Narf the Mouse Posted November 19, 2009 Report Share Posted November 19, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Why are you taking the shears to Gossamer the Monster with such vigor? A: They gave you Lies, and in return you gave them Hell. Q: Well, that's why the marriage didn't last beyond the cheating... A: Cooookieeees! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted November 19, 2009 Report Share Posted November 19, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Well, that's why the marriage didn't last beyond the cheating... A: Cooookieeees! Q: Why is my computer so slow? A: Find him and kill him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted November 19, 2009 Report Share Posted November 19, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Find him and kill him. Q: What should I do about the person who invented computer "cookies"? A: Sure, just do it slowly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted November 19, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 19, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Sure' date=' just do it slowly.[/quote'] Q: Can I use a chainsaw to kill the man who invented computer cookies? A: Not as messy as I would have thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Not as messy as I would have thought. Q - So, how did it go with the chainsaw and the guy who invented computer cookies? A - I was overcome with dread and a sense of great personal danger. But I'm better now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions Q - So, how did it go with the chainsaw and the guy who invented computer cookies? A - I was overcome with dread and a sense of great personal danger. But I'm better now. Q: What happened when you met George Bush Jr.? A: Tennis bombs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted November 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Tennis bombs. Q: Why don't more sports stations cover Wimbledon? A: Almost naked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Almost naked. Q: What possible reason is there to watch beach volleyball? A: Well, that's better than almost alive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Well' date=' that's better than almost alive.[/quote'] Q: Granny's still breathing, so she is definitely alive. A: Given the choice, I think I'd rather date the zombie. Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Given the choice' date=' I think I'd rather date the zombie.[/quote'] Q: From this list who would you choose: Death, a lich, a vampire queen, or a zombie? A: Pepsi, rum and tv. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Pepsi' date=' rum and tv.[/quote'] Q: How did you become unconscious on your sofa again? A: And thus bad architecture gives way to good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Why are you stockpiling explosives? A: It's hot enough to melt water! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: It's hot enough to melt water! Q - Why did you bring us to somewhere so cold? It can't be more that 275 Kelvins out here! A - You'll never see a bigger bang than this one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted November 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A - You'll never see a bigger bang than this one. Q: OK, Demolition Man... why did you bring us back to the beginning of time? A: Some liquid oxygen will fix that right up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Some liquid oxygen will fix that right up. Q - You didn't light the charcoal? The guests will be here in, like, 30 seconds! How will we get the grill ready in time? A - Combustion is the answer. Combustion is always the answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A - Combustion is the answer. Combustion is always the answer. Q: How does a serial arsonist look at the world. A: The money is no problem. I just do this for kicks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted November 22, 2009 Report Share Posted November 22, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: The money is no problem. I just do this for kicks. Q: [To Bill Gates] Why did you just make all computers answer only to you? A: It is for the Three Bears. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 23, 2009 Report Share Posted November 23, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: It is for the Three Bears. Q - Why have you set out a large steel trap, a medium-sized steel trap, and a small steel trap? A - Funny, I don't recall having asked you for your opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 23, 2009 Report Share Posted November 23, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A - Funny' date=' I don't recall having asked you for your opinion.[/quote'] Q: I think the funniest vignette was the one where the swan goosed you in the crotch and you sprayed beer out your nose all over your boss's wife! Wasn't that a hoot? A: Hey, it was humiliating, but at least it wasn't violent. Yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Did you enjoy your prank of dumping blood all over Carrie? A: High school class of one survivor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Did you enjoy your prank of dumping blood all over Carrie? A: High school class of one survivor. Q: Did you go to Assassination High? A: Breathing is a priviledge, not a right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Breathing is a privilege' date=' not a right.[/quote'] Q - Name one controversial stipulation not included in the 1000+ page Health Care Reform Bill currently under consideration by the US Congress. A - I'd really rather not, thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A - I'd really rather not' date=' thanks.[/quote'] Q: Want to go to Jupiter in a little red wagon? A:I'm not gonna take your Mickey Mouse money! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted November 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 25, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: I'm not gonna take your Mickey Mouse money! Q: Now that I've made a bundle from the Disney contract, I can afford to pay you back. How much do I owe you? A: Not really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 25, 2009 Report Share Posted November 25, 2009 Re: Answers & Questions A: Not really. Q - Do you like me? Do you really, really like me? A - That's all I've got for tonight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.