Blue Jogger Posted February 29, 2008 Report Share Posted February 29, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Hopscotch - Drinking too much of this finely aged scotch will make the imbiber hop around on one foot and start counting. This is a not so subtle hint that one has had enough alcohol. In all other ways, it is high quality scotch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted March 23, 2008 Report Share Posted March 23, 2008 Club of the Month Club of Roam. The subject struck by this club becomes dazed and wanders off. Lucius Alexander And a roaming palindromedary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curufea Posted March 24, 2008 Report Share Posted March 24, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells TTYF! For those who aren't familiar with Tunnels & Trolls: Take That You Fiend! - basic wizard blast spell. I've heard of similar cute things - in the Bernice Summerfield radio drama series (she's a time travelling archealogist ex-companion of the Doctor) - she had the ship and house computers programmed to respond to "Bastard! Bastard! Bastard!" and instantly mix a Gin&Tonic for her In the Andromeda series, Beka's secret password to overide her ships safety protocols is "Shut up and do it!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Jogger Posted March 24, 2008 Report Share Posted March 24, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Spell Checker When cast over a written copy of the spell, red wavy lines appear over the words whose meaning is likely to endanger the caster. Green wavy lines appear over words and phrases who meaning do not follow formal thaumaturgic guidelines. There was a more advanced version that summoned a helper, "It looks like you are trying to perfect a fireball spell, would you like some help?" Sadly, this version was doomed to failure and only caused frustration and interfered with research. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curufea Posted March 24, 2008 Report Share Posted March 24, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Word: Processor Created by the same literary obsessed mage as the previous Spell Checker. This is a spell compilation spell, it intuitively combines different component properties of a spell together to form a coherent whole. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowcat1313 Posted March 24, 2008 Report Share Posted March 24, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells How about these... Furball: causes monster with fur or hair to immediately start coughing up a hairball. Misspell Magic: acts as a counterspell, for instance, your allowed to change up to 2 letters. Power Word Kill could become Power Word Krill, which could also be useful for summoning dinner I guess. Fiery Balls: only usable on male targets Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells How about these... Misspell Magic: acts as a counterspell, for instance, your allowed to change up to 2 letters. Power Word Kill could become Power Word Krill, which could also be useful for summoning dinner I guess. Or Power Word Kilt Lucius Alexander The palindromedary exclaims: Great Scott!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 Re: Club of the Month Club of Roam. The subject struck by this club becomes dazed and wanders off. Lucius Alexander And a roaming palindromedary I forgot to add: The club also generates an anti-growth suppression field and drains size based STR and BOD of creatures larger than the possessor of the club. Lucius Alexander Where did the palindromedary wander off to? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadowsoul Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells One more song reference item and then I better stop before this gets out of hand. The Hit-The-Road Jack-Hammer. A weapon created by the eccentric Dwarven Mage and Explorer Jack Benimble. As well as crushing skulls the hammer can be used for travel. It has a powerful teleport spell triggered by striking it against any road, street or path and crying - "No more, no more, no more!" the only flaw in this item is the fact that it can not return the user to a place where it has been triggered, because Jack only ever liked to see new places. A few other thoughts. The Sword of Sorcery. A legendary blade that captures the energy of any spell sent against the wielder and converts it into temporary boost of their physical strength. Rear View Mirror. Long ranged scrying device created by a lonely old wizard to allow remote viewing of a very particular piece of anatomy. Much in demand at certain parties. The Mag-Light of Truth. The beam of this powerful torch banishes illusions as easily as the darkness that it illuminates. (Batteries not included). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowcat1313 Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells heres one for the gourmets and the hobbits Sword of Saucery... +1 magic shortsword. also acts as a dagger of spices... instead of injecting poison, it injects spices... gives new meaning to currying ones favor. or is that flavor. Magic Sword Ability... this is actually a typo from original D&D Detect Meal... Kind and amount, was supposed to be Detect Metal more Misspell Magic: Magic Mussel... acts like a 1 round single target silence spell where the caster points at the target and says "Clam Up" Maize Spell: Buries Caster in an avalanche of corn More Demented Ideas: Wall of Stoned Wall of Mice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curufea Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells A Stitch in Time. A rescue spell of limited use - it stops time for as long as it takes to rescue 9 people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted March 26, 2008 Report Share Posted March 26, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Boots of Riverdancing. Cursed Item. When wearer tries to do any dance, he (or she) immediately starts prancing around like they're Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curufea Posted March 26, 2008 Report Share Posted March 26, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Lard of the Dance A mischievous spell intended to be used to cause confusion at social gatherings. All dancers start slipping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted March 28, 2008 Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells I'm so tempted to write some of these up... Lucius Alexander Summoning a palindromedary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remjin Posted March 29, 2008 Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Power Word: Kilt - Summons a kilt to replace whatever target is wearing. Comes with small bottle of alcohol. Sweet Tee - summons a shirt of pure sugar. Butthurt Toast - *snigger* I leave it to your imagination. (butthurt... buttered... eh, get it? Okay, so I'm not that creative or funny...) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted March 30, 2008 Report Share Posted March 30, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Spell: Farce of Nature. Summons an Environmentalist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted April 6, 2008 Report Share Posted April 6, 2008 Club of the Month Club of the Month for April: Turkey Club Not only useful as a club, but if used in batfowling or otherwise turned against avians, is a Transformation: Bird to Delicious Sandwich. Lucius Alexander The palindromedary wonders if the Club of the Month Book needs its own thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Jogger Posted April 6, 2008 Report Share Posted April 6, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Darn, I was hoping for the Roast Beast Club. Club does an extra 1D6 RKA (No Range) of heat damage. It not only kills the target, but cooks the meat evenly and can singe all the hair or feathers off. This can be quite disturbing if used on humanoid opponents. Three times per day, a command word can be spoken and drenches the target in BBQ sauce. The command word is, of course, WTFOMGBBQ. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Rapier of Wit: A magical device favored by the more intelligent combatant. Despite it's appearance, it actually isn't a magical sword. While worn and sheathed, it gives the possessor the ability to make cutting remarks and piercing queries of his target -- which actually cause bodily hard. Build: Rapier of Wit: Naked Advantage: Does Body (up to 20 INT; +1) - Incantations(-1/4), OIF(-1/2) *and* Naked Advantage: Penetrating(up to 20 INT; +1/2) - Incantations(-1/4), OIF(-1/2). "Ha-HA! Skewered by my Rapier Wit!" (Note: I'm not sure if I would need UAA to actually be able to use INT offensively in the first place) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadowsoul Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Veil of Tears. These shimmering veils can only be woven by a woman who still feels the pangs of true heartbreak and has learnt the hidden art of turning her own tears into thread. Once made the veil absorbs a portion of the weaver's sorrow and will serve in subtle ways to shield her from further pain. The face of the wearer appears as a dim and shifting phantasm, no one can remember her features but all are captivated by them so that even a woman lacking in charisma can become a mistress of manipulation. Furthermore the veil constantly sings a faint and whispering song that only the wearer can hear, this melody rises to drown out any hurtful comments that anyone makes to the user but fades to nothing when others speak in tones of grief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted April 7, 2008 Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells If magic were around today (and we still had about the same technology), one thing I'd expect to see would be the Square Hole Drill Bit. Chuck the drill bit into your electric drill, Bzzzzzzt! And presto! A square hole instead of a round one! It's not a play on words, but I thought it neat enough to post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alibear Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells And you'd be able to get tinned tartan pain, a leg of salmon, a left-handed hammer, a long stand and sky hooks would be all the rage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadowsoul Posted April 9, 2008 Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells Hells Bells. A fiendish weapon in the form of a large flail with heavy spiked bells in place of the normal lumps of iron. These bells are cast in the shape of gaping demon snouts with snake-like tongues as clappers. Swinging the weapon round one's head causes a hideous chorus of snarls and wails that terrifies and stuns your enemies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Goodwin Posted April 14, 2008 Report Share Posted April 14, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells And you'd be able to get tinned tartan pain' date=' a leg of salmon, a left-handed hammer, a long stand and sky hooks would be all the rage.[/quote'] A hundred feet of flight line, and a bucket of prop wash. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted April 15, 2008 Report Share Posted April 15, 2008 Re: Play on words magic items/spells And you can rinse it off in the Jet Stream! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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